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MARIAM’S JOURNEY

written by Mariam July 29, 2019
MARIAM’S JOURNEY

Hubby and I have been married 5 years. Prior to meeting him I had a funny menstrual cycle. I could go months without seeing my period but I preferred it to the 3days wailing and moaning I went through anytime it reared its head.

When I wasn’t getting pregnant 6months into marriage, we decided to see a gynaecologist. The doctor diagnosed me with PCOS and just threw in so many fertility drugs.

Within two months I was twice my size. Then came the mood swings, unending tiredness, frequent bloats that made you look 6months pregnant and inability to work under any circumstance. I begged my husband to change hospitals as the doctor won’t say much to me during scans except give me drugs. I needed an explanation as to what exactly was going on in me and what my chances were. He agreed and we moved on to Doctor No.2.

Doctor 2 without making me run any tests, just threw in same drugs plus new ones based on my word of mouth diagnosis from Doctor No.1 She was even worse as I could only see her every other month. Then came doctor no. 3 and 4. I was worn out. We were both exhausted. A friend from church suggested her doctor who had helped deliver her baby and told me about how good he was/is. So I convinced hubby and we made our first appointment. I was made to run a series of tests and my doctor blatantly told me I had no traces of PCOS. I mean I’ve been on meds for solid two years just because of misdiagnosis! What I was suffering from was ENDOMETRIOSIS.

My whole world came crushing down. Through the back and forth and stress, my doctor decided I needed surgery when my left leg couldn’t walk for close to three months. It was at a fatal point when my doctor discovered I had blood clots all over my womb and intestines but God came through. After surgery wasn’t easy. I developed a heart condition and depression so I was referred to the cardiothoracic centre as well the psychiatric ward for further help.
This journey hasn’t been easy. Hubby and I lost so much of our savings. We fought so many times when we both got frustrated. I asked for a divorce so he could move on and have kids. He stayed. I pushed him away many times but he stayed. Sometimes I feel lucky and other times I feel cursed. I question myself and God several times in a day and wonder how different my life would’ve been with kids. I eventually learnt the hard way when I survived a suicide attempt. I’m in a much better place now. I’m happier and healthier and it’s important we live our lives to the fullest regardless of what we have or not. Hubby and I are more calm now and enjoying each other better.

My advice to other trying women is to live life and enjoy now.

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5 comments

Afiya July 29, 2019 - 10:51 am

You are a strong and amazing woman. If you ever read this, my darling….faith over fear. You are amazing and no less of a woman. you are strong AND YOUR TESTIMONY IS FAST APPROACHING. I DON’T KNOW YOU BUT SENDING HUGS, KISSES, AND LOVE YOUR WAY.

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Eno July 29, 2019 - 3:43 pm

Thank you Afiya. She will definitely get this message. Amen!

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Sussie Elizabeth August 1, 2019 - 9:10 pm

God is not done with you my dear. He’ll soon fill your mouth with a testimony. Stay blessed!

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Eno August 6, 2019 - 9:39 am

Amen! on her behalf

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Stacey September 25, 2019 - 2:06 pm

Hmmm, it is well.
I know God will surprise you with a miracle baby. You wont even know when and how you got pregnant. I pray for peace and strength to go through each day. PCOS and Endo are not easy to live with, and the comments from people who do not know the struggle you go through daily can be painful but you are strong mama, you will go through this with your head up high. God will give you a song to sing, never give up

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